I got to meet with Dave Isay, the founder of StoryCorp! I’ve been a fan and listened to StoryCorp stories on PBS for years, so this was a real delight. If you are not familiar, Dave founded StoryCorp 20 years ago with the mission to preserve and share people’s stories to create connections and create a more just and compassionate world.
It’s a BIG mission and to date they have recorded and archived in the Library of Congress, the conversations of nearly 1 million people. Only a small fraction of the stories recorded ever make it on to the radio and honestly they never fail to touch me.
The reason I got to meet Dave Isay and Sandra Clark, Story Corp’s new CEO, is because they launched a really important new project called One Small Step in 3 cities: Richmond, VA, Wichita, KS and Fresno, CA.
They shared with me and other Richmond area business leaders details about the project and their mission to combat the increasing polarization and division in our country.
In our world of 24/7 news cycles and attention getting headlines, they are trying to be a voice for finding common ground and connection. They have developed a proven interview methodology that brings together strangers with different political views to record a 50-minute conversation—not to debate politics, but to learn who each other are, as people. Through these conversations they shine a light on our experiences and who we are (vs focusing on our differences). It brings people together as a first, small step toward building bridges across divides.
The Power of a Positive Intention
As I was listening to them talk and share examples, I was struck by how powerful it is when we can share a positive intention. The shared intention can be, as with One Small Step, as simple as I will listen to you. It does not mean that we will agree. But it does provide common ground. And that common ground gives an opening to be able to listen.
Becoming more comfortable and expert with high stakes or difficult conversations is a core skill that I coach leaders and teams on. Now more than ever, with open leadership models, virtual and hybrid workplaces, generational differences in communication and language, not to mention polarization outside of the workplace and in the media, its important that you are skilled in handling difficult high stakes conversations.
Hard conversations appear for all kinds of reasons, whether it’s a disagreement between leaders, partners, employees, or customers, every aspect of business has the potential for conflict.
For a starting point, a good way to open a difficult conversation is to literally say “First I want to share that my (positive) intention for this conversation is _____”.
Make sure your intention is sincere. You are creating an opportunity to both listen and to be heard. (Note: if you can’t find a positive intention or outcome yet, it’s best to delay the conversation until you are less triggered.)
The good news is that you really can learn how to do this. And practice does make it easier!
Now, over to you, what resonated for you? It's always good to hear from you and I respond to every message.
In partnership,
Andrea Infelt Almaraz
I invite you to sign up for The Positive newsletter, published every 2 weeks,
focused on practical management advice for you and your team, Kolbe Tips & Insights and more.
